To all our highly valued clients and acquaintances:
I recently attended a zoom event with about 60 professional colleagues on this topic.
“Coaching the Murky Waters of Uncertainty”
The discussion started off with observations of how many people are currently in pain, confusion, and fear, to the degree that it is sometimes palpable. We considered that there is a sense of rudder-lessness. Many people are questioning who we are and where we are going, including fear for our children, our grandchildren, and our futures.
The discussion sounded like ideas from Adam Grant, Wharton’s top-rated professor for seven straight years. As an organizational psychologist, he is a leading expert on how we can find motivation and meaning and live more generous and creative lives.
In a recent New York Times article published on April 19, 2021, Adam Grant wrote:
“Feeling Blah During the Pandemic? It’s Called Languishing …The neglected middle child of mental health can dull your motivation and focus — and it may be the dominant emotion of 2021.”
Grant – “Those who find themselves languishing – feeling a lack of focus and a general purgatory between wellness and illness – can try to carve out some uninterrupted time to feel better about accomplishing tasks, focus on small joys and victories, and shouldn’t feel embarrassed to ask for help just because they aren’t dealing with a more serious issue. Languishing is “the absence of feeling good about your life”. He then suggests:
“Make the effort to reconnect with people. Rediscover new ways to experience joy. Build routines into your lifestyle to reestablish feelings of control. Make plans for your future, even if you do not feel like it – and build in contingencies, or a plan B, if necessary…
…Remind yourself of your values and look for any upsides to the “new normal”. Get creative and be kind to yourself. And help others if you can – one of the most rewarding and meaningful experiences in life is to be there for other people.” Sounds good to me.
People now have choices even though they do not know what they will be. There is a space between what is no longer and what is not yet. This is a time to access resources that will help us stay in a creative state of fascination, curiosity, discovery, and wonder.
Our first challenge is to be with what is so and then lean into any discomfort. We can optimize support networks, via communication and collaboration, to open new doors.
I used to say, “fake it ‘til you make it”. Some people now say to “face it ‘til you make it”.
I have advocated being unstoppable and part of that includes that we periodically stop.
Sometimes we need to be stoppable – take a break – refresh – catch our breath – reset – reconstitute ourselves – chart courses for our next stage – create clarity for ourselves.
When I encounter more obstacles than I can count, I am reminded that “what’s on our path is the path”. In the book, The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph, Marcus Aurelius is cited as saying nearly 2000 years ago: “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
Our next order of business? Extreme self-care. Being the “eye of our hurricanes” – that center of calm amid all the swirling around of events in our lives. Finding ways to anchor and ground ourselves to optimize our strengths. To keep connecting to what we are grateful for and building from there. To focus on what we can control and who we are being in the face of whatever. Being creative, resourceful, capable to grow ourselves.
Some suggest optimizing our “resilience continuum” – where are we in that spectrum?
Suffering can be fertile ground for growth – we are not to be undone by it, but can learn.
How can I be my best for myself, expand my capacities and create new muscles?
On The Murky Waters of Uncertainty zoomcall, we encouraged each other to further strengthen our Personal Foundations, as well as help others to do the same or better.
What IS a Personal Foundation? Just as a skyscraper needs a deep and strong foundation to support its weight and to weather the elements, we too need strong foundations to honor our true selves, to reach our full potential and to enjoy our lives to the fullest. This class is for those who are looking to strengthen themselves and to gain forward momentum in their lives. The deeper and stronger our personal foundation, the higher we’ll be able to climb and the less effort that climb will require. Learn more here.
What are the main things that you need to keep as your main things?
Investing a few minutes to jot down your responses to this question may serve you well.
Are you setting yourself up in ways that make the most sense, going forward?
We surely hope so and will cheerlead you to be your best and highest. At your service.
Gratefully yours,
Don
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Email: don@donsardella.com
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